It is easy to get tired of the difficult path you are supposed to travel on and give yourself a break. Particularly when the other areas of your life are also in disarray. But the important thing is to keep pushing.
And that is exactly what I have not been doing. It is so easy to get distracted, fall into the well of self pity and what not. Then I sit and weep and not amount of sitcoms can help! That really is rock bottom.
But today I slept a lot. A LOT. After I finally woke up, I felt different. Not sorry for myself or my situation. Just normal. And guilty as fuck. Yes thats a feeling ingrained into us. If not being productive, must feel guilty. I swear sometimes I wish I had been born European. They chill out without even having done hard work prior to!
Anyway, I can sense the dark shift in my husband's mood. He got me my dog, he is letting me be and is supporting me in every possible way so as to help me achieve my goals and As of now I'm at a standstill. Well I will see his face turn into my parent's disappointed faces no more.
Enough said.
And that is exactly what I have not been doing. It is so easy to get distracted, fall into the well of self pity and what not. Then I sit and weep and not amount of sitcoms can help! That really is rock bottom.
But today I slept a lot. A LOT. After I finally woke up, I felt different. Not sorry for myself or my situation. Just normal. And guilty as fuck. Yes thats a feeling ingrained into us. If not being productive, must feel guilty. I swear sometimes I wish I had been born European. They chill out without even having done hard work prior to!
Anyway, I can sense the dark shift in my husband's mood. He got me my dog, he is letting me be and is supporting me in every possible way so as to help me achieve my goals and As of now I'm at a standstill. Well I will see his face turn into my parent's disappointed faces no more.
Enough said.
No comments:
Post a Comment